The Internet and the invention of the personal computer are perhaps the most significant creations of the twentieth century, offering unprecedented communication and information sharing possibilities, however, this great blessing has been marred by the dangerous presence of Internet predators and the possibility of addiction.  There are not many significant studies that have been completed and published, but there are still ways we can apply what we already know about child development to Internet use.  The following information is by no means to be considered a comprehensive account, but merely a starting point.

Children at this age are beginning to explore on their own, but it is very important that parents are in close contact as the children explore the Net.  For children this age, it is recommended that their Internet use be restricted to only sites a parent has visited and feel is appropriate.  It is important that children in this stage have positive results from Internet use and avoid sites that may be frustrating to them.

During this stage of life, a child will begin to look outside of the immediate family for new information, and peer pressure begins to become an issue. It is also a time when children begin to look for more independence.  For these children, consider having the computer in a central location where the child can explore, but is also not alone with the computer.  This way, they are independent, but less at risk.  It is at this stage that parents must begin to be concerned about how long their child spends using the Internet.  There is no magic time that is “too much.”  Addiction, compulsion, and behaviors that reflect these are not that simple, but monitoring the time spent now will aid in the positive development of behavioral patterns.

Age 12-14

Children this age are experiencing an ever-increasing need for independence. This, combined with the sexual development of the adolescent, can be a very dangerous and difficult situation to navigate concerning the Internet.  This interest in things sexual is normal and healthy development, unfortunately our children are given unhealthy models and opportunities for manifestation in the media and popular culture and can have difficulty dealing with their own development in a productive way.  During this early period of exploration, it is especially necessary for children to understand that their actions are being monitored. The Internet is awash with pornography and sexually explicit sites that are easily detected and blocked by available software, but research has shown that children are very adept at finding inappropriate material regardless of this software.  Parents must be aware that there are pornographic sites that do not use sexually explicit language, acting as Trojan Horse filled with unsuitable material. Teenagers are also more likely at this stage to begin taking risks, so they need to further explore the concept of self-control. They will soon be adults, and in the event that the Internet is misused, it is recommended that they not only lose privileges, but also be seriously engaged in discussion and encouraged to explore their own conclusions about how to use this tool effectively and safely.

Please review the contract on the back with your child, initialing each item and post it by your computer.  This is an excellent opportunity to teach a double lesson—Internet safety and Integrity. Internet Use Contract

____    I will not give out personal information to anyone online without discussion.

____    I will inform my parents right away if I come across material that makes me uncomfortable.

____    I will never agree to meet anyone from online without permission.

____    I will never send a picture to someone I meet online without permission.

____    I will not respond to any messages that are mean or make me feel uncomfortable, and I will ask an adult for help in dealing with the situation.

____    I will set rules with my parents concerning sites that I may visit and the time of day and length of time I am allowed online.

____    I will check with my parents before downloading any software or documents that may harm the computer or compromise the safety and privacy of my family.

____    I will be a good online citizen and not do anything that hurts other people, including spreading rumors or blogging in an unkind or hurtful way.

____    I will help my parents understand fun things about the Internet.

Entered into on this ____ day of _______, ______

Signatures of Parties Present:____________________________